Never again

You will get peace only when you will be so strong that not a single thing from your past can make you fall apart.

I'm not there yet, but someday I will be.

I promised myself not to turn to anyone or seek solace from others until the day I fully recover from this horrible state I'm currently in. I'll patch things up and pick up the broken pieces of my heart by myself, it's pointless to expect others to mend my broken heart when I can't even let go of the past. I'll be stronger. I'll show you that I deserve to be happy too.  

I can't do this to myself anymore, I can't afford to waste any more time, waiting on you. I have a life too, so why should I give up mine for you? I've learnt that when you fall too hard, you'll end up find yourself on the concrete ground, hurting like crazy. Sometimes, the effort you put into a relationship doesn't guarantee you a happy ending. And when fate steps in, two people who are not meant to be, somehow just wouldn't end up together. 

Because of you, I'm afraid, terrified to love again, trust again and start over with anyone at all. Time, all I need now is time. To heal, to repair the damage you've done to my heart. A close friend once told me: it doesn't always take as long as it lasted to recover. And I hope it doesn't, because I wouldn't want to be crying over you every night for the next 5 years. 

You called, and I answered. Who knew you were gonna brag about how flawless she is or how happy you are now, or how much you're longing to see her, or how much you miss her? I don't give a shit, but still I stayed on the other end, just so I get to hear your voice. Well, not anymore. Next time you call, I'm not gonna pick up. 

I'm still hurting, each and every day. It's gonna take awhile to feel nothing at all when it comes to you. I've got a thousand unsent messages in my drafts, 16 pages of unread letters in my drawer for you, so much to tell you, but you'll never be able to hear it. Cause it wouldn't make a difference even if I said what's on my mind, you'll just do what you do best-ignore me.

Forever? Yeah, guess what? I'm not gonna be the fool again. 

When one door of happiness closes, another opens; but often we look so long at the closed door that we do not see the one which has been opened for us.